I wasn't ready to quite give up the goat idea however. I think because they are semi useful and semi cute and don't want to sleep in my bed.
And now, I may not have to because not one, but two friends have verified the existence of something called Fainting Goats. As soon as I heard about them, I had the following conversation with Levi:
Me: Hey Levi, I heard about something called fainting goats.
Levi: How do you do it?
Me: Well, I think that if someone scares them, they faint.
Levi: Could I faint the goat?
Me: I think we'd have to take turns.
Levi: What day would I get?
Me: Oh, probably the same day that you get to pray first for devotions.
Levi: What if I scared it, but it didn't faint?
Me: I'd let you try three times a day.
Levi: What if it fainted on the first try?
Me: Then you'd be done.
Levi: That's good. They probably don't want to faint all the time.